I’m one week and one day into the worst pain.
Scratch that. In my life time I’ve had 11 knee surgeries, had my femur cut in half, and given birth without medication. Even without the surgeries, I’m pretty sure the baby out of me with out medication puts me in a not so small group of people who win on the ‘worst pain ever’ odometer.
Regardless, on New Years Eve I woke up to a crazy busy day – And I was prepared for it. I went to bed early, I woke up early, I was pumped and ready!
If you’re a mom, you know that being early for anything with a new born pretty much deserves an award, so I was pretty proud if myself. But then it happened.
People warm you about ‘proper breast feeding form’ which sounds mildly crazy, but guess what? So true. I just learned the hard way…
Hours before I had to be at work on possibly the busiest single day of the year, I put Everly on me to feed her and immediately knew I was screwed.
You know that moment when you pinch something, but you think, “It’s not set! Just maybe if I move back it will un-click!” That was my moment. Only it didn’t fix. I saw my day and panicked. I removed Everly, called the chiropractor and begged for 5 minutes. They told me I could come in at 8:30. It was 8:24 and I live 15 minutes from there. I flew. Snow on the ground, baby unbuttoned with out pants on, it didn’t matter, I was screwed if I couldn’t move. I needed that appointment!
Then those words you don’t want to hear. “This isn’t going to fix today”. Ugh. Well, a week and a day later and I’m still here in pain. Five appointments later and I still cringe to move.
That will teach me. Or not. I mean, I have the boppy. Everyone swears by the boppy. I, however, am convinced it was made for shorter people (which now I’ve been told have the same problem I do), or people with really saggy boobs (so maybe it works great for the SECOND baby, after the first has taken all the pep out of your boobs). It just is not thick enough. I have to slouch A LOT if I want it to work. Clearly not fixing the problem.
I still round my shoulders when I feed, I’m pretty sure throwing my hip to hold my 18 pound five month old also doesn’t help, I sleep well, but probably not as well as I use to, and I’m constantly carrying my baby.
Normally I’d think there had to be a better way, or something to fix it, but let’s be serious. Would you rather be entirely normal or hold your child?
I guess giving my body up for children wasn’t just a metaphor, and it didn’t quite mean what everyone thought or intended it to mean for me…
So I have my “body” back, but what about the normal functioning part?